Won't you stay
by qsmadness007
Summary: A songfic involving Julian and Tomas


"Won't you stay?"

Disclaimer: I do not own the characters, they belong to Shawn Ryan. Song lyrics belong to Alanis Morissette

A/N: A little piece of song-fic fluff, written from Tomas's POV

_that I would be good even if I did nothing  
that I would be good even if I got the thumbs down  
that I would be good if I got and stayed sick  
that I would be good even if I gained ten pounds_

I stare at him as he eats dinner. He must think I am a freak; I am barely touching my food. It is nice to have a man in the house with me, one that I am realizing that I love greatly. I can't believe I almost have a real boyfriend. Okay, he is a bit of a paranoid, closeted freak, but I still love him, and he seems to slowly be alright with what is going on between us. He comes over almost every night now, though it is sad that we can't really go out and do things.

He looks up at me wiping a bit of pasta sauce from his chin. "What? Did I do something?" He is confused, and seems a bit saddened.

I chuckle. "Sorry, you are just really cute." I take a sip of wine, watching him intensely. I give him a smile. "Didn't mean to alarm you?"

"If you don't want to alarm me, eat your food like a good boy." He smirks at me, the light gleaming at his beautiful black head. He reaches across the table, and takes my hand for a second, giving me a smile.

_that I would be fine even if I went bankrupt  
that I would be good if I lost my hair and my youth  
that I would be great if I was no longer queen  
that I would be grand if I was not all knowing_

After dinner, he holds me tight on the couch as we watch a movie. I am not worried that soon I will have to find a new place to live; I am not worried about anything. I am enjoying the comfort of him holding me. I had doubts before that maybe this relationship was just about sex, and it seemed in the beginning for the both of us that was what we wanted. Now, it is different. Now, this feels right, as I sit in his lap, his arms wrapped around me.

I turn slightly to stare at his face. I smile at him, and crane my head a little to kiss his soft lips. He parts his lips a little, excepting my kiss. He is so cute, I can't believe my luck. It feels odd that all my life, my luck seems to have been bad, but he seems to have changed that. I think if he is here long enough, he will change everything, and I won't be the lonely mess that I am when he is not here.

He kisses my forehead softly. It was the first time when he kissed me like that, I realized I love him. While, I enjoy the passion, and fury that we have sometimes when we are ripping each others clothes off. I enjoy the gentleness that he invokes at times like this.

He gives me a soft smile, his eyes seemed pain. "I have to go soon, so, let's finish watching the movie. It's nice just sitting here holding you."

"We don't have to watch the movie," I tease softly. I know we will finish watching the movie though, he has to go to work soon, and he doesn't want to be tired out for work.

"Later…Next week." He frowns a little, his voice sounds a bit pained.

"You're not coming tomorrow." I pout a little, pretending to make big sad, puppy eyes.

"I can't." He gives me a frown. "You know I can't."

"I know, I will just miss you." I bite my lip a little watching him. I turn back towards the movie, burrowing my head a little in his chest.

"You'll be okay."

_that I would be loved even when I numb myself  
that I would be good even when I am overwhelmed  
that I would be loved even when I was fuming  
that I would be good even if I was clingy_

that I would be good even if I lost sanity  
that I would be good  
whether with or without you

The movie ends, and he kisses me on the forehead. He touches his forehead to mine, and looks into my eyes. "Be good, okay. I will see you again soon."

"I wish you didn't have to go." I frown. He kisses me again on the forehead, and pushes me a little so I will get out of his lap. I stand, so that he can get up.

He stands quickly, stretching. Then, he pulls me into a hug; I turn my head sideways, so I can lay it on his chest for a moment.

"Be safe at work."

He unleashes me from the hug. "I will." He kisses my cheek, and then heads out the door.

I hope he is right; I am starting to realize I have no idea what I would do if I lost him, or if he suddenly decides not to be in this relationship.


End file.
